Achievement of anything you want is exclusively, purely and entirely dependent on you, your effort, commitment, resilience, desire for it and consistency.’
That’s a statement we hear almost every day. It emphasizes on the need for us to take full charge and control of everything that happen to and for us. Little, if anything, should be left to chance, fate, the government, or other people. I agree on the government part.
But really, to what extent are our dreams and aspirations dependent on our abilities, grit and the strength of our desires to see them come true? Are we really the masters of our destinies or is there a greater power connecting us to all the pieces of the puzzle of the universe? What if we are just a piece of the puzzle in our own lives and our family (including the nosy aunt), friends, employees/employers are the remaining pieces? Could it be that we’re not just here to fulfill what we imagine we are here for?
Is there a possibility that the people, experiences and situations we meet as we cruise through life are placed there strategically to propel us to our real purpose in life? Or is it all inconsequential and eventually it is all dependent on our abilities and strength? Is it possible that there is someone who is like the central piece of the puzzle in our life while we’re busy trying to make it solo? I don’t like that idea the least.
I however believe that The Individual has been over-emphasized. The notion that we control how and where our lives will end up -ENTIRELY- is a fallacy that in the long run breeds greed, insensitivity, arrogance and disconnect among humans. We trump on everyone, burn down to ashes otherwise heathy relationships and destroy our environment simply because we believe we should control everything and everyone or else our destinies will be the stuff of lore, a myth.
We live in a culture where everyone bows at the altar of individual. People are spurred to use phrases like ‘I am a self-made man’ ‘I run my own life’ ‘I owe no one shit’ ‘I don’t need a man/woman’ . We want to attribute our achievements to us and us only. That way, no one ‘has got anything on us’. People will easily forget all the interactions they had, opportunities availed to them by others, assistance they got along the way and it will turn to a ‘me’ moment. This is partly and rightfully so informed by the fact that some individuals who help us might end up using us as puppets. But are we really self-made?
Now, am I advocating for an ‘I am a victim’ mentality? Certainly not. Never. I don’t subscribe to that mentality either. I believe everything we do every day plays a role in shaping the direction our lives take. I believe we are in charge – to a greater extent – of the direction our lives take. On the other hand, I strongly believe we depend on others to be what we were pre-destined to be. Granted, I am making sweeping stereotypes here but I strongly believe nobody is entirely, self-made. We can debate on the level or degree of dependence but nobody, no one can claim to have the autonomous of self and therefore independent in the absolute meaning of the word.
In our dependence on the other humans, environment as well as the brute creations, we need to be humane, vulnerable and present. It calls on us to acknowledge and share our dreams and aspirations, fears and emotions. It calls upon us to be sensitive and considerate of the other party and to seek mutually beneficial node of interaction.
The risky part of this transcendent truth is that if you are unlucky enough, you will pour out your dreams and ambitions to someone and they will belittle them, run away with them or just ignore them. Your fears and insecurities will be used to bring you to your knees. It could even be the end of your life as a vulnerable, emotional, fully alive human. . On the other hand, the madwoman Karma might be on your side and you’ll find people who own your dream and want to see you grow and prosper.
Either way, we are not the sole masters of our lives. It is an interconnection of people, things-all strings being pulled by a higher power that is rooting for us. In my case, I believe God is this power.
This is my own post. My own thoughts. I didn’t even type it using a laptop made by some Japanese. Where I live? I made that too. Call me Mr. Individual.